Sunday, April 17, 2011

Killing Kittens

I have some friends who can't help but hit the forward button to everyone in their e-mail address book everytime they get the cutesy e-mails of fluffy kittens or "A Prayer for You."

I finally drafted this e-mail and hit "Reply All" to their most recent posts - sending the word to just about 100 strangers.

Dear Group E-mail sender,

  • Regarding E-hugs, I prefer them in person with people I know and not a group-hug shared with the cold and electronic addresses in your Cc line.
  • The E-Prayer, E-Angel or E-Jesus that you send eventually ends up in my E-Trash. I then get the option to "Delete Jesus Forever? [Yes] [No]" Hmmm. Decisions, decisions. Why would you do that to Jesus?
  • When forwarding pictures of adorable puppies and kittens please do not forget to include the recipes.
  • Let me spoil it for you. That promise of a "really cool thing" that happens to your screen after you forward an e-mail to ten people? -- you're disappointed,
    3 people get pissed off,
    3 people deleted it without reading it,
    2 people have your address blocked from sending them e-mails,
    1 address is undeliverable, and
    1 idiot forwards it to 10 more people. Cool, huh?
  • I have automatic withholding from every paycheck, with a final rendering no later than April 15th each year and do not need to be reminded to "support our troops."
  • You said if you don't get that [e-mail wish] back from me you'll "know I'm not your friend." So why do you keep sending them? I thought I was being clear.
  • If you're worried about God being removed from politics and schools, do not fear. Have faith that she is where she pleases.
  • The stories of serendipity and random acts of kindness taste great, but are less filling than a quasi-cash deposit to my pay-pal account. ( It's so easy, Sign up for a PayPal account at Click the Send Money tab, Enter an amount, and the recipient's address mine is )
  • I can pretty much guarantee you that by fate, luck, chance, kismet, destiny, happenstance, coincidence, predestination, faith or a willing god, faerie, spirit, sprite, God or Goddess that something good, bad or indifferent will happen to you whether or not you forward this e-mail to the number of people of your choice.

Chuck Walker

Your Nature Name?

I would have to say that the biggest things I accomplished yeterday is the discovery of my true Indian name.

Nevermind that I'm Scottish. Everyone should have a name that connects them to Nature - I think - so instead of calling it an Indian name, I'll call it a Nature Name.

Mine may be "Naps with Cats."

There is a HUGE difference between taking a catnap, and taking a nap with cats. I highly recommend the latter.

Exhaustive studies, which were quite refreshing, conducted in my own home, have led me to the conclusion that one sleeps better, deeper, longer, and more snuggly with a cat stretched out on or beside you.

And that's what I did yesterday. It may also help that yesterday was rain rain rain.

Well, I did make a good-sized list of things to do and, let's see, . . . I did three and a quarter of them. Groceries, Bills, Laundry, Bank, Knit. (Laundry and knit are still incomplete).

I will consult the great list today as well.

Saturday, April 16, 2011

Stream of Consciousness

Now I find I have time on my hands and no list.

It's my first day of spring break. What to do?

I have lots of creative projects and must-get-done projects and I don't know where to start because I don't have list.

I promised I'd start journaling more and would try a little stream of consciousness writing to see if I could give myself a little direction.

I have been living without a LIST for quite a while now. That doesn't mean I've been idle. It just means that I've been only just getting through without working toward any well-defined goals.

After I finish my coffee today I'll sit and begin making some good lists. Then I'll go back and prioritize and make sublists.

Paint, knit, bills, construction, yard, home, clean, bills, groceries, recycling, family, letter writing, lesson planning, blogging, Prissmas, career planning, . . .

I'm not sure where to start.

Fortunately it's a foggy rainy day so napping will have to be added to the list.

Laundry, new glasses, dental appointment, storage space, reading for fun, book study, recipes, . . .

If I don't have a good list in place soon, before I know it, I'll find myself in my first teacher's summer sitting in this same spot doing the same thing.

Clean Jeep, new Jeep top?, design knit patterns, witch's garden, pagan studies, tarot, . . .

All these things jump in and out of my head while I drive to and from work each weekday, and once I get home, all I want to do is go to bed with a book.

My first thought each workday morning is "Today is [insert day] so I must . . ."

My first thought each weekend is "I overslept! No, wait. No school today so I must . . ."

Know myself. Know my craft. Learn. Apply knowledge with wisdom. Achieve balance. Keep my words in good order. Keep my thoughts in good order. Celebrate life! Attune with the cycles of the earth. Breathe and eat correctly. Exercise the body. Meditate. Respect the energy. (Goals of a witch.)

I also have to remember things that I promised to do for other people, like post the Bush family confession - where did I put that?

This is the most disorganized I've been in quite a while. "Time keeps on slippin', slippin' into the future."

The very first item on my list should be love my husband . . .

Play with my dogs, pet my cats, mark a meandering path through the hillside, rake up the acorns, twigs, and leaves, move some rocks, clear the porch, plant signs in the garden, what to plant with bulbs? . . .

Determine to be happy - celebrate life - enjoy the little things -

Post blog entry and finish coffee.